Friday, September 11, 2009

I will not give up, cos I love you.

I am speechless, and tired down to the bones. After chatting with Hamdi yesterday night, and lots of tears... I kept telling myself to give up. I cried on the bus. He said that he loves me, but the feeling is already different. He isn't ready to be in a relationship again. I scarred him.

If only I could turn back time, I would do anything I could've done to show him I love him, treasure him. Rather than to cry from all the hurt right now. He's right. He's got ample time in the world, and he loves himself. At least, he knows how to appreciate his love for himself. Giving your love to others, may turn out to be drastic. I so understand how he feels... Because its all coming back to me now. Its retribution.

I love Hamdi. And he loves me. When 2 people are in love, yet they cannot be together, its such pain that one will try to kill him/herself. I didn't sleep last night. My mind was full of memories. The times when we kissed, the times I scolded him like thrash...

I neglected something I love so much. Only to learn to regret it now. But he's right, its too late. Feelings are so difficult to change. But I want him back in my life. I can't go on without him.

He's my first true love. And I love him.

What can I do to make you come back...

by pammie! at 1:51 PM |

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